The Kind of Mom I Am
The Kind of Mom I am
Let me tell you a little bit about just the kind of Mom I am. I can’t even remember what kind of Mom I wanted to be before I had kids, because that was a long time ago. But, I am not ashamed to share what motherhood is really like for me and my girls.
Not a Mommy Blogger
I’m not really a Mommy blogger, right? Sure I have a couple of kids, and I love them dearly, but my kids are not all I talk about. I don’t yap on about what I feed them (probably because I’d be embarrassed by their diets) and how I taught them to tie their shoes (why should I teach them when Coach is doing it for them? I thought they’d be in junior high before they learned!), but I try to keep you up-to-date on the latest happenings involving my kiddos. They, Pooh and Tigger, mean the world to me, and for just that reason, I do not elaborate on their daily lives and share every detail of their upbringing on this blog. That’s just one humble Mom’s way of protecting her children from the crazy world (and protecting herself from the scrutiny of others who seem to do parenting perfectly…hee hee!).
*Gasp*…what? I’m not a perfect parent? Nope, I am certainly not. I try my best to be kind and gentle with my girls, I make sure they are fed and clothed and clean, and I show my love and affection for them multiple times a day with hugs and kisses…but I am not perfect.
I also occasionally yell, scream, holler, fuss, complain, and grumble (but I do ask fairly nicely the first 12 times).
I accidentally let bad words fly in their presence.
I let them drink sodas and eat candy on occasion.
I don’t buy organic-everything. Actually, they’ve tried nearly every menu item at McDonald’s (except the Filet-O-Fish).
I don’t volunteer at every single opportunity that comes up in their social calendar.
I don’t sell all of their fundraiser items for them, which means they never get awards for being top seller.
I don’t like to fix their hair at 6:30 in the morning (sometimes I do, but I don’t like it). I also have not successfully taught them how to fix their own hair. They usually only get about four haircuts a year, which is twice as many as I get. They can brush it, and put it into ponytails and buns and stuff, but I’m pretty sure Jimmie taught them those things.
I don’t keep their nails trimmed. Pooh’s get really long and Tigger eats hers off. They also usually have splotches of three-month-old polish on them, still hanging on for dear life.
Sometimes I miss things that are important to them because I have to work. Not often, but sometimes. (Here’s hoping that scaling back to just one job will remedy that.)
See how un-perfect I am? It’s disgraceful, I know. I should do better at these things, and I always mean to, but life just doesn’t always allow perfection.
Sometimes I do things right
Sometimes, just sometimes, I do something right. Tigger and I had a Mommy-Daughter date the other night while Pooh was busy with marching band activities. Pooh has been showered with praise for her accomplishments, and we’ve all been running 90-to-nothing to keep up with her band schedule. This date with my baby was much needed, and I enjoyed it more than I can explain. Tigger talked and talked and talked and talked…and I listened. I learned things that she had never before shared. I can tell you from experience that one-on-one time is so valuable because each of them seems to open up more about what’s on her mind when it’s just one. We went out to dinner, to a couple of stores where she could spend the $6 she had saved (and to get her a dress for the funeral…I always feel horrible when I realize one of them has outgrown everything in her closet), and then to the grocery. She helped me plan the meals for our busy week, and made grocery shopping more fun! Every now and then, I do something right. I said “no” to requests of me, set work aside, and spent some quality time with my youngest daughter. That’s the kind of Mom I am.
This is not a proud moment, but a thankful one. I’m thankful for my kids, and for the times that I get things right. We probably shouldn’t have spent the extra money to go out to eat and shop, but it was still worth it. I’m so very grateful for both of my girls, and nothing can keep me from loving them, or from raising them to be hard-working, respectful individuals. I’ve also had a hand in molding their hilarious little personalities, and taught them how to have a sense of humor. They know how to wash their own clothes, clean their own bathroom, and take care of their pets. They know their manners, and mind them. They make excellent grades. They respect their teachers and fellow students at school. They leave ponytail holders and bobby pins all over the house. They leave their toothpaste-spit in the sink. They let their belongings pile up on the stairs for days, until I start growling and tossing them up instead of asking them to carry them.
See? We have a balance. They’re ok with the kind of Mom I am, I think, and I am definitely ok with doing my best, making a few mistakes, and spending quality time with my girls.
Thanks for reading today; I needed to be a Mommy blogger for a minute. I’d love it if you shared some funny parenting stories with me in the comments. What do you do as a parent that makes you feel ashamed? What do you do that makes you feel thankful? I’d love to know…I’ll read them tonight with my third glass of wine.
X,O,X,O, Martie
September 30, 2015 @ 8:55 am
Not a parenting story, but when Pooh and I were playing airplane and I zoomed her over my head, both of us laughing with our mouths wide open, she drooled. She was teething and drooled a large pool of it right into my open laughing mouth. So I use that a lot when she gets grouchy and won’t take her stuff up my stairs. I remind her that once she drooled a lot and it was funny and gross all at the same time. So yeah.
October 2, 2015 @ 6:44 am
I bet she feels mortified that her baby self drooled in your mouth…NOT! Hahaha! Love you Jimmie!
September 30, 2015 @ 10:53 am
I love t his post; I am a stepmom and sometimes try TOO hard to be the best mom I can be. My theory? Love them fiercely. Because when I look back on how my folks parented me, all I remember is how much they told me they loved me and how much fun we had. I didn’t remember the food I was told too eat, the bedtimes I had or when they were frustrated with me. It is the happy moments they we remember!
October 2, 2015 @ 6:43 am
I’m the same way! I know I got yelled at and disciplined, but those things don’t stand out. I only remember the “I love you”s and the fun stuff. That’s what gives me hope! Lol! Thanks so much for your comment!
September 30, 2015 @ 1:49 pm
You must be doing a lot right.
September 30, 2015 @ 3:54 pm
Ya think? ?
September 30, 2015 @ 8:34 pm
Oh my! Where I could go with this… You know we have a blended family. I inherited 3 amazing kiddos that I had no idea how to influence. From day one as a mom I’ve been terrified. I’ve always been scared that I’m being too strict, too easy, too nosey, not involved enough, say the wrong things, don’t say enough. You just never know. I’m trying to convince myself, daily, that all I can do is the best I can. And pray the rest works out. And as they become adults… Which is happening now … They will make good choices. Stay close to God. And make me and their dad proud.
As far as funny stories… Too many to count. But knowing these kids you know there are some true knee slapped going on on the regular!
October 2, 2015 @ 6:48 am
You did inherit three great ones. I can tell you this…I didn’t appreciate my step-parents as much until I was older, and we had some bumps in the road. Papa and I clicked when I was around 13 or 14, and we had a great relationship from then on out. It took longer with JiJi, I think, but maybe that’s a girl thing? Eventually, she and I came to an understanding, and I realized what an amazing wife she is to my Dad, and what an awesome Mom she is to my little sister, and now she is a fabulous Grandmother to my girls. If things ever seem tough, just wait it out…you’ll be one of the most treasured people in their lives someday very soon! Love you so much! Keep being you, because you are AWESOME! 🙂