Morning Hair Parenting 101 (With Links That Help)

Y’all, it’s been one of those morning hair catastrophe days, and I feel like I need to go back to parenting 101. If you have a teenaged girl in your home, you know what I mean. Her room looked like a war zone, there were tears on the Eggo waffles, and no amount of begging, pleading, yelling or eye rolling could have gotten my family out the door on time….all because of morning hair.

Pooh wanted her hair straightened, and I’ve yet to convince her to learn to do it herself.  Who would want to learn with a ~eye roll~ stupid hairdresser for a Mom (let’s face it, aren’t we parents ~eye roll~ stupid everything at that age)? Anywho, since I still do the morning hair, I feel like it’s my fault when the hair routine causes tardiness. I could say no, but I fear that will open a whole other can of worms, and they’d probably still be late.

morning hair

Morning Hair Back In The Day

My morning hair routine as a 14-year-old consisted of me spending entirely too much time arguing and fussing with my own hair.  This was in the late 80’s, early 90’s, mind you, so my bangs had to be tall enough to touch the headliner in my sister’s ’69 Karman Ghia, while also being perfectly placed and coifed.

morning hair

My bestie, “Happy”, and me.

There was no compromising; huge AND perfect were non-negotiable requirements.  I would curl, tease, place, cuss, throw my comb, and start over at least four times every morning, often resulting in a tardy.  What made this better than the situation I’m currently in was that Madre would be peacefully sitting down somewhere with her cup of coffee, then leisurely getting herself dressed and ready while my morning hair took place. She clearly did not need parenting 101, as she knew when to stay the hell out of the way.

And, oh my GOSH, what if I had a zit?  All hell would break loose.  Between my morning hair routine and my blemished skin, there weren’t too many pleasant mornings with me as a teenager.

You see, Madre wasn’t a ~eye roll~ stupid hairdresser, or a stupid Mom. Sure, she was a master at creating pigtails and ponytails when we were younger, and I would have put her up against any plastic surgeon when it came to lifting our faces and tightening the skin around our eyes with her morning hair skills. But once we hit puberty and started having opinions, she politely bowed out and left us to our own devices when it came to morning hair. That was so smart.  And if we had a pimple or some other blemish, she just calmly pointed out that it wasn’t that bad. Genius, I tell you.

do as i say, not as i do

So, yeah, it was a rough morning at my house. I was flat ironing as fast as I could. Coach was pacing the floor, lamenting his lateness. After the morning hair routine was complete, I was being the ever-dreaded drill sergeant, clapping my hands at my teenager while she ingested said Eggos in 3 bites and brushed the Nutella off of her $5000 metal clad teeth. I took too long to do her morning hair. If she had done her hair herself, they still would have been late, but I would have felt less guilty about the drill sergeant bit.  Know what I mean?

Don’t let morning hair or blemished skin ruin your day. You can start your morning hair parenting 101 with these three posts that I wrote a while back: 

Saving Hair From The Flat Iron, One User At a Time ~ Learn proper flat iron techniques in this one, then do yourself a favor and teach your daughter(s).

Tween Hair Care For Beginners ~ These awesome tricks and tools are perfect for DIY hairstyling for your little angels.

Skincare for Beginners: Start Early! ~ Help your sweet little pink dumplings learn to care for their own skin early, so you won’t have bad mornings later!

It’s nice to have an arsenal of hair and skin tips before the kids get to “that age”, trust me.  As you can tell by reading this post, having that arsenal, or even being the author of that arsenal, will not guarantee that you won’t have bad mornings.  But it may help, just a little! Please, share your morning hair war stories with me in the comments!  I don’t wan’t to feel alone, or like I need to go back to parenting 101.

Is it too early for a drink?

X,O,X,O,   Martie